tic-toc, tic-toc

I started packing last night. It wasn't even an hour after I stated, my balikbayan box was already full. This is it, I'm really going home. I tried not to get emotional about it but I am torn. I am excited to go home, no question. But I'm also sad about leaving San Antonio, my home for 5 years.

I just finished calling Time Warner to cancel my phone and digital cable service. No more TFC. I'm not leaving until July but saving some is actually the best thing to do right now. Good thing websites are now showing full episodes. You know how much of a tv junkie I am. Besides, I'm still retaining my basic cable, and of course my internet connection. As I put finished cancelling services, I felt a little pinch in my heart. There's no stopping this now.

I have yet to book my flight. And I still have a few activities left before the D-day. Every day it's getting harder and harder to think about it. I'm going to miss my work, my friends, the opportunities that are open to me, the ease of life that I have become accustomed to, the kind of money I earn, the luxury of life that are within my reach.

On the other hand I am rally excited to be with my family again. To have my friends beside me. I'm excited to see how my bathroom and my mom's kitchen are turning out. I'm excited to be back in my comfort zone again.

Two more months. The clock ain't stopping. July will come sooner than I want it to but in a way, I'm ready. I can't wait to soak in my new tub!

30cc's dayquil, 2tabs motrin and left-tover pizza

I'm starting to believe Ronnie when she says I'm always sick. I denied it several times but now that I'm suffering from my 2nd bout of flu for the year, just when Flu season has been declared over, I'm starting to doubt my conviction.

Friday: I thought it was just allergies when I woke up with a sore throat and a headache. I managed to survive the day and still had a little energy left to join my amigas for dinner at Papacito's. But I knew that was it for me, no dancing, not even with Marissa's promise that a shot or two of tequila would make things better.

Saturday, 4am: I woke up because my nose was clogged and I was having chills even under my comforter. (take note, the thermostat's set at 75F). I thought to myself "Darn, I'm officially sick again!". Another dose of nyquil and motrin and I went back to sleep. Woke up 6 hours after with the same symptoms. I hate being sick.

Saturday pm: I finally dragged myself out of my bed and into the couch. Coffee was all I wanted but Grace had cooked some sour meat soup (Sinigang) so I had some of that. Exactly what my mom would have prepared for me. I miss my mom.....*sob*

Sunday 8am: No change to how I feel. I thought about tomorrow...Monday...I have to go to work. At the rate I'm feeling, I don't think I can. But we'll see.

For now, let me eat my left-over pizza so I can take something to make me feel better.

Mig Ayesa ROCKS!

My eyes were puffy and my nose was congested from da*n allergies. But that did not stop me from seeing Mig's show at the Hardrock.


Mig was awesome! Made me remember why I voted for him week after week during his Rockstar INXS stint, aside from him being Filipino, of course. It was an intimate show and he sang mostly from his album, some remakes and originals. He gave away sample cd's which I'm also uploading here so that y'all can listen to it.



bringing back my blogspot entry (Sept 16, 2005) "Yet another different note.......MiG Ayesa, the Australia-based Filipino is one of the three finalists for the reality tv show "Rockstar: INXS". Last Wednesday was the very first time ever that he was on the bottom 3 and got to sing an INXS song for the elimination. He was great. And that camel (colored) leather pants? My goodness! I think maybe he shares his wife's clothes, they're all too sexy! Well, if he can get away with it, that's not too bad, right???? Tuesday's definitely a stay at home day , that's D-day! I'll be happy if either MiG or Marty wins. JD???? not while I can still remember how he murdered "We are the Champions"!"

Hah! I told you I was a fan from way back then. And JD won, BTW. But that's ok. As Mig himself said, if he won, then he wouldn't be in San Antonio touring. Blessing in disguise.

Mig has an album coming up in April. And I'm definitely buying!

luxury

Nowadays, it's become a luxury to be able to press the stop button instead of snooze, knowing that it wouldn't matter to oversleep.

It's become a luxury to be able to stay in bed and stretch, unlike hectic mornings when I've already showered and dressed and yet it felt like the day has not begun.

A luxury to be able to curl up and watch my fave tv shows, away from the jungle (you know what I'm talking about).

Thank God for days off.

next chapter

Hindi kaya ako napasubo? Ilang kilay kaya ang aabot sa kisame? Ano naman ang ituutro ko dun?

Ok, I'm talking about precepting and intern. Special request ni Victoria e, gusto nya akong maging preceptor. 2 years pa lang ako sa Tele, kung tutuusin, isa ako sa mga bago sa unit. Halos lahat kasi ng mga nurses sa Tele ay more than 4 years na dun, marami na nga sa kanila ang RN III. Sa Ortho, semi-permanent charge nurse na ako, decision-maker, resource person. Paglipat ko sa Tele,nagsimula akong muli. Ibang level ito, maraming desisyon na hindi ko pa kayang gawin. Nung mga una, ni hindi ko kayang desisyunan kong pwede nang bumaba ng Xray ang pasyente na hindi nakamonitor. Kahit 2 years na ako dito, marami pa akong kulang. Hindi pa nga ako nakapagbolus ng Cardizem, never pa akong nag cardioversion. Samantalang sa Ortho, in less than a year, parang wala ng bago, said na lahat ng pwedeng matutunan.

Hinga ng malalim.....kung iisipin ko tlaga, magandang opportunity ito. Before ako umalis ng Ortho, naka schedule na ako sa preceptor class but since lumipat ako, naudlot na yun. By Feb, naka schedule na ulit ako. Isa pa, naisip ko na pagkakataon ko na ding magamit ang natutunan ko. Madalas akong tinatanong ni Gerry kung anong ginagawa ko sa floor, samantalang may MSN ako. Ano nga ba?

Ok, hinga ulit ng malalim. Tama, gagawin ko na 'to. Kaya ko 'to.

Another day in the JUNGLE

My day started out quick. I had a patient who is a nurse, whose 2 daughters are nurses and whose daughters' daughters are also nurses. 3 generations of nurses has the key to making my life wonderful or just miserable. Nurses, believe it or not, can be the most annoying patients. They think they know what needed to be done, they think they know what they want done. They are not afraid to verbalize their wants, their needs, their preferences. They do not want special attention, they demand it, they expect it. Nurses also have the tendency to be vigilant and observant about your every move. Are you washing you hands as long as you should? Are you using the right size needle for an IM injection? Did you explain what the procedures are for? Did you count the RR for a full minute? Do you know the side effects of the meds you're giving? I can name them all, but you get the picture.

I was hoping this was going to be the exception but having a family of nurses does not paint a very promising picture. I was right, however. SHE was the exception to the stereotype. She actually understood when it took time for me to answer her calls, or when I sent someone else on my behalf. She sent me out to do my "thing" while she's in the bathroom because she knew I "had a lot of stuff going on." She thanked me immensely for finding an extra tray for her daughter so that she need not go out anymore in the nasty weather we were experiencing. She understood what t was like to be a nurse. She was a nurse.

rewards

when rewards come unexpectedly, it has a deeper, more genuine feeling to it. Someone had shadowed me at least 3-4 times the last 2 months. She was an extern that have decided to take on the internship program offered by our hospital. I loved having her because she was really enthusiastic, always with a smile that working with her just gave you a little bit of much needed sunshine especially in days where it makes you wonder why the he*l you chose to be a nurse.

She just signed her contract for the internship program and she indicated that she wanted me to continue precepting her. That just made my heart swell. Just for that, I have committed myself for 5 more years in the jungle. More alligators, and tigers and ungrateful monkeys. And I'll greet them with a smile everytime. That's what being a nurse is all about.